I did it to show I can be responsible, so I was actually showing off, because I saw someone else do it, I wanted to follow. Basically I was taking my nail varnish off to put some more on and as soon as it happened and I saw the face on my parents, I ran into the bathroom, thinking "I don't want to be told off" but as I spilt the remover of course my family saw it spill, and yes I got a telling off.
Now I am an adult, I can now reason with it, and to say I learned my lesson, and rarely paint my nails, and when I do, I rarely use remover.
This effected my confidence with using nail polish remover, because I am still clumsy but feel a little distrust in myself to do so. I know I can use it without spilling it, but I have spilt again on carpet and so I feel me and remover will always have a love hate relationship, and it is because I need to change my relationship with. I know now to use it when in the bathroom over the sink, but took me a while to be logical about it. It is a habit, and like habits they do tend to take us back and I am still clumsy but better and not being so bloody naive.
This is made me less stressed about it and about other things, like leaving my bag in a shop, and did this once in Tesco's where I live, left my rucksack with my laptop with it, but luckily it was found and given in.
Do I still use that rucksack? Yes,
Have I done the same since? No
So have I learned? Yes
I did feel myself want to panic? Yes,
Was anything taken?No.
My anxiety started, but I took control, and that has changed me in being more reliable when it carrying my possessions, and sort it out before the panic jumps in.
If something is stressing you out constantly then changes need to be maid because it will effect your wellbeing and your confidence, because it's gonna constantly play in your mind, until you take action.
I have an inner strength now since those incidents, because it raised my awareness. I will take my time rather than rushing, and value myself in remembering stuff and no longer living in a day dream.
When we beat ourselves up, all it does is cause restrictions to not do that again, in case the same thing happens, but believe in yourself and make changes, so now when put nail varnish on and take off with remover I know to take my time and over the sink. Nothing drastic has to change, just be more logical about it.
Many thanks for reading,
Carrie X
Typical London Gal
