FIND WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY! IGNORE HATERS.

I have talked about this before, but I want to talk about it again, as I do still cringe when I see myself in the mirror at times, and there is a line in the, Bruce Springsteen song Dancing in the Dark, "I want to change my clothes, my hair, my face" and I sing this out, because, yes I do feel this way sometimes, and have, Changed my clothes, my hair and did think about my face too.

I went through a faze of changing my hair colour, wanting to be tanned and get rid of what was known as "Puppy fat", that I had as a kid.

Then once going through my clothes one day, I realised that I was slimmer than what I had realised, as I found a skirt that I bought to be part of a suit, as I had a jacket to go with it aswell, and wore it when I was 12 at my Cousins wedding, and was a size 6.

Eyes and mirrors can be deceiving at times, and I used to hate trying clothes on, in Fitting rooms in high street stores and I would get very upset and give up and go home.

The one thing I am going to do whenever I feel ugly, I am going to put together some pictures of myself, where I know I have looked okay, and for me to see that actually I don't look terrible and have looked good.

I have listened to those that have put me down, for their own satisfaction and to make themselves feel good. It is hard to take that at times, but once in secondary school, when one girls tried to do this a lot, I then turned on her and did the same, to see if she liked it and no she did not, and cried, because if your gonna dish it out, you then should be able to take it back.

Ignore haters. I do say this a lot, because repetition helps it go in your head and stay there. They will always be around, unfortunately, but honestly they do this, for one reason, because they actually telling you something negative about them, and that is, that they are so insecure and jealous and are the ugly ones because of this and not you.

Being comfortable in your own skin takes time, if you have been bought up with parents who are insecure about their looks too, it can be passed down. I have changed being a mum, because I see it from my son's eyes and try to do this a lot, as he doesn't see size when he looks at me, he sees me as his mum who loves him out of the world, and that is important and loves you no matter how you look.

Do what ever helps. If you feel make up will give you a boost of confidence then wear it, and I do. Not all the time, but it does help me see that I can look good, even if I don't without it, I do like smart clothes and do like to be smart casual.

I do spend a lot on skincare and use different scented haircare products, I do read self help books, and listen to audio books and podcasts, whenever I get a chance. There is a brilliant on called, Doing it scared, by Ruth Soukup. If you register on her site, she sends them to your email, on a weekly basis.

There is a brilliant book by Vern Cotton about being happy:

Happy: Finding joy in every day and letting go of perfect

Do what makes you happy, don't put pressure on yourself, because you do what I have done a lot is compare yourself or felt pressure by images online, and look through photos, and find the one that makes you the most happy. Enlarge it, put it in a frame and onto a wall, so when you feel down about yourself, look at it and see, you are beautiful and you don't have to be a super model, or have a super body to look good, because you already do.

Please check out my blog on the related site to this one, about Living a More Productive life 2021

Many thanks for reading,

Carrie X

P.S: Please check out my Just Giving page of the charity I am raising money for, called Tommy's. They support and raise awareness of Stillbirths and Premature births.