Day 3 of Blog challenge: Does Anxiety Effect Your Confidence/Managing Anxiety

Hello it is Day 3 and feels like it should be the second day and sure is going fast this week, but enjoying it. I like to take on tasks that are outside my comfort zone and there is so much I want to share. 

I suffer with anxiety a lot, like I am always fluttering to check a trillen times to check that I have everything I need each day to get to and from places. and trying not to go into panic zone.

It can really throw me off key yet I am learning to relax and not frett and just take my time. 

I often feel that I am not good enough and that then makes me ask questions like, "Who would want me?" and "Am I attractive" "I can't connect with people all of the time", but yet I know so many people so I have to rein myself in and reflect in my head that, it is just me seeing, analysing and then, I do go over well, "I have a roof over my head" and "I have worked and met so many people and made them laugh" so I must be doing something right, "I can look good when I have down days about myself " and is the niggly thoughts that can really get to me. 

The Anxiety then forms, but getting to grips with it. Like to day I eaten more than what I normally do and felt extra hungry today, so I did a workout whilst looking after my son Henry and gave me a great burst of, "See you know you can do it" as I like many avoid exercise but when I do it, I enjoy it and, it is in my head. It's understanding the pattern of my anxiety I feel. I do argue with the inner critic, and go through it and pull myself through. 

Today I feared going to have my Smear Test and was dreading it, because of the clamp thing they use to swab, so rearranged it for next week at a better time.

I do take medication to help but for me that is not always the answer, but feel I have a good balance now and did my first 10,000 steps walk this week now in 2022 and it felt so good. This then has got in touch with my happy side of the brain and want to do more to help my lack of self confidence which can cause my anxiety and it can go both ways. 

I really do hope these blogs do help you and please leave a comment below and I will be writing more until Sunday and then I will plan more challenges that helps with my Anxiety and just now as I finish this book I watched a Portrait video of Henry my son got me looking a myself and not liking what I see. 

Yet, I am looking and gonna use my insecurities to stir me to keep up with walking and doing exercise. I am going to do some self care that helps, like moisturise my face, dehair parts of my body tomorrow when I have my shower, gonna put some make up on and film it, and keep and go over the goals I have set and add and change parts of them. 

So more to come tomorrow and so thanks for your time so far, and going to do more work on myself to stop looking at myself and giving myself a hard time. 

Many thanks for reading,

Carrie X 

Day 2: Self Confidence Blog Challenge/Restarting Your Life and Not Just For the New Year

It is day 2 of my blog challenge, please check out my blog I did yesterday. 

https://buildingselfconfidencetud.blogspot.com/2022/01/my-first-blog-challenge-for-2022.html

In this blog post I am talking about how to Restart your life and not just for the New year. So did you set resolutions this year? and have you continued them on or given up the ghost?

I set goals and make Life changes, for example this year I not eating any foods like crisps as I have realised I don't need them in my diet and listen to my body and that has taken time, but so far so good. I know I can give these up as have done so before and it is making small changes that can help towards the bigger goals, like I was diagnosed a few years back of having what I had felt, Diabetes Type 2 and now got it under control and have a good sugar level now and made me feel good about myself.  

It has done wonders for my confidence and always change up my exercise routine by going on what is going on in my life and so I exercise on Sundays, Mondays and Tuesdays and I love doing so. 

So to restart your life is to go through the items in your life you want to keep and what to get rid off and start in one area of your life at a time. Log it in by writing it down of what to stick with. 

Bring in new things to your life, like for me it is to be a Playworker to support kids who need care during the school holidays and did nursery work but was very anxious and my mental health had deteriorated and needed time to recover, so now I am ready for new challenges, hence this blog challenge. 

Challenge yourself too, and can do this whilst making changes to build confidence and if it is appearance like it has been for me, take time in planning different looks and seek advice. I am loving my clothes now and the outfits I can put together. 

Check out my Pinterest of the vision boards I have created for myself: https://www.pinterest.co.uk/thetypicalLondongal/_created/

Last year it was creating EBooks each day for 21 days and really set me on track and then I got help for my anxiety and depression and so this year is to implement things to help my mindset and this can effect confidence and when you do changes we can often doubt them but stick with them, by setting challenges.

If you'd like to check out my EBooks you can on Amazon.com under the names. Carrie Challoner, Carrie Lee Holmes and Carrie Holmes.

If you are struggling with day to day, then it means you need a change of environment so like yesterday I went for a long walk yet had written a huge list of things to do, but needed to be outdoors and really helped clear out my mind and address my feelings of myself. 

I am fed up of being self critical, as it can become draining and so get yourself out of the house and why not meet up with someone as with no more lockdown, touching wood, we can now see our friends and I am planning days out too, as not been up Central London for while and so plan to take my son Henry up there this coming weekend to get out of four walls. 

Fresh air works wonders, so get out and be around good environments that gives you peace. I love to walk along the river and so why I enjoyed yesterday's long walk. 

Have a change around, that can make a difference, for example I would use Sundays to clean and tidy my cube units I used to have change them up and spend time dusting and cleaning shelf by shelf and once finished made me want to go onto the next task. It is so fullfilling to do jobs like that done. 

I am not a fan of cleaning but do like the end result. 

Seeing good results is a must if you are not then you need to keep trying and testing before you find the things you like that do give you good results. 

The results I have seen is that I am getting more things completed and can do things out of my comfort zone like ringing up companies to work with, but then when they are done feel so good for it. I not someone who even though I worked in a call centre, talking a long time on the telephone, but it knew I had to do it, as I may be helping other children to and from school. 

It just has to be worth the while but when you see changes working it makes it totally worth it.

So, I will be posting again tomorrow so please remember to like my blog and thanks for those reading my blogs on this site already, means a lot. 

Many thanks for reading, 

Carrie X 

 

My First Blog Challenge for 2022

Hello so not blogged on here for a few weeks. I have been planning a challenge and I am going to be posting everyday this week to write on this site for seven days.

I did let everyone know in my newsletter I wrote for January 2022, please visit my site https://everyonecanbuildacastle.com

Its going to be fun as it going to be able building a better confidence for 2022 and accomplishing more things into your life and I see this year to be the best year yet. 

So I am going to write about Restarting your life and not just in the new year and how having a good routine helps with confidence and can Anxiety effect your confidence. Dealing with Anger when we lack confidence, dressing to build a positive mindset when it comes to body confident, and how to manage our emotions and is good to cry? 

If you'd like to share your body confidence stories to me then please do via the comments section below. 

I listen to a lot of Mel Robbins who says those feelings, bring us down will always be there, but how making changes big or small, can help you to manage the fears of not being unconfident, and knowing how to control your own mind can really make a differents. I have via audible read her book the 5 Second Rule and have her new book the Hi Five Habit ready to listen to aswell. 

The blogs will be for a full 7 days, so last one will be on Sunday which is not a day I usually post blogs but will for this challenge as there is so much I want to share with you. 

So the next blog will tomorrow and will be about What you can accomplish and learning your thoughts. 

Many thanks for reading, 

Carrie X  

Changing the look of ourselves

Do you look in the mirror or do you avoid?

I used to a lot and I hated fitting rooms in shops and this would make me get so upset that I would feel totally ugly. 

How many of you can identify with that?

I would love your answers if you do this and how you deal with them (coment below).

Making small changes can make all the difference or just one thing. I don't wear make up all of the time, but when I see hair above my lip it can make feel so alien, yet I know other women feel like this too. Polystictive Ovaries can cause this and so it can really destroy you in the heart, and I know people say "Well you've got all you limbs so you should feel lucky" but when you see a version of yourself that you don't recognise as you can be soul destroying. 

People would say use cream, get used to it, its not the most important thing, but being a woman having such problems, it can really drag us down and they say you shouldn't shave because it makes the grow back even longer and I used the NO NO but it didn't fix it and so I use razors and hate having to do this but I do so to make me feel better when I do, and it for me is taking control and taking actions to make me feel good. 

I don't want to be shaving my hair above my lip, but I feel the need to do so to make me feel happy with what I see in the mirror. I can understand why those who have had cancer and lose their hair due to Kimo wear a scarf to cover up the loss of hair and again I bet they wished the didn't have to/, but it makes them feel better so surely that is important? 

What I like to do is when I do feel good is take a selfie and created a photo book of these so when I have a down day about myself could look at it, I written some afirmations and journal too and I practice a lot of self care and this has been a game changer, like using a body scrub, mositerisers and nice shower gels. 

Just minimal changes can go a long way so give those a try. 

Many thanks for reading, 

Carrie X 

Lose confidents in yourself when there is nowhere to go/how to still see people during the winter days

Hello and welcome to a new blog! Today's blog is about lose confidents in yourself when there is nowhere to go. 

This was me in the Spring where it was Lockdown and I was desperate to get outside but because of Lockdown, and felt a feeling of "Where can I go?" and I stayed in. I have a heart condition and that was why I was keeping myself indoors and safe.

When there is nowhere go to you can feel stuck and depressed, so if there is another lockdown I am still going to pop out and go for walks and visit any store that is open just to browse and to see new faces and places. 

I am still going to make sure that this Christmas is better than last year and say good morning to people if they say it to you, and you can still have playdates or meet ups you just have to keep your distance and why not take some hot chocolate in a flask to share with your kids and fellow parents, and going to use the time to exercise and still go for my walk on Christmas day which I love to do, and take my son out to play football or on his bike or scooter, and get outdoors. 

Getting in touch with nature always makes a different to me and watching the birds and Squirrels running around and if Bocketts Farm is open this year this is great to see some animals and even some raindeer, and pehaps Santa Claus. 

If you don't have family near you then make the most of the internet and other luxuries, and why not have a movie night with a few people around if you live on your own and do have friends and family close by. 

So lets not allow any lockdown to stop us from enjoying our lives.

Many thanks for reading, 

Carrie X 

 

As if life was really that way/triggers of low self esteem feelings

I would love to be cured of my constant jabs at myself, but I have done this so much through my life to know that as much as I want those thoughts will soon creep back in if i don't act upon it. 

Since being in my 40's I have seen a lot of change in myself. I now am proud to be me and it has taken a long time to feel that way. 

Today I noticed my facial hair that I get just above my mouth really gets at me, thank god for skincare tbat I have a way to control it and for it to go and isn't really a lot but it makes me very self concious. 

If only there was a pill I could get to help prevent the growth of it. I would definitely take it and in fact I would think about having lazer treatment but that costs a lot so I have bought some disposable trimmers and did the treat to get rid of it. 

I am listening to a Paul McKenna book about confidence and has a lot of hyponsis tips in it, and gonna listen to it in a minute and found that his books are great to help me when having a down day about myself. Just being able to salute myself is a step forward and have been tried doing Mel Robbins The High Five Rule and go it ready to listen to on audio but been watching her videos that she has been making so you don't need to purchase the book, and it does help. 

when it comes to confidence I find when I am in a comfortable place I will make a coffee or a cup of tea without fear, but if it someone I don't know and worried about the atmosphere my low self esteem sets in and feel like I wish to be invisible at times. 

People think that you are not socialable but I am. As a kid I loved it when a whole group of us family and friend would go on holiday together because they were people I known from since a child and knew without being fearful. As a kid I would often be shy around family and could never workout myself why that is. 

Lacking confidence becomes a habit that is hard to break, but doesn't mean it can't be done and you can change, as I now see that it is a form of protection, and measuring the good with the bad. 

You can move on and to do that spend time to create new special things in your world, if it is a new make up rather than the some all the time or a scented candle when having a bath or reading a book. 

Is life how you make it? I am not sure now as I think mapping it out is better and go through, that was the passed, this is now and this is what is next. 

Many thanks for reading, 

Carrie X 

Tea and Coffee how it comforts me and then lowered my confidence as a kid

As a kid I was a tea drinker and now I switch between the two, and it I am not sure if this is a normal thing being a grown up now, I do not know but with my tea I am quite precise in what I like. I am going to try and finish my jar of Nescafe, and not been great and gonna go back to Kenco Jar and there is a richer one I want to try. 

Why has these drinks come into my life?

Because when you get older your taste of things change, and for comfort. With tea I drank it like orange juice and has always been part of my life. When I have a cup it helps me reflect on things happening in my life, passed, present and future, yet my snn who is 8 years old has never had a cup and drinks water or milk and reminds me of the things I experienced in my life that is different for him. 

If he ever wanted to join me and in having a cup I would oblige as it never stopped me. Yet when tea did stain my teeth it made me really self conscious and felt ashamed of my teeth. 

I stopped drinking so much and the dentist at the time told me to cut down to 2 to 3 cups a day and this was hard as I was like, what else can I drink? I didn't drink water as I found it tastless and didn't help me, I didn't drink cans of drink as I could never finished one, and so it was tough to hear that, and did follow for a few days but not for long I was drinking so much. 

Now though I have 1 to 2 cups a day and may be a third in the winter, but I do cut it down and now my teeth are back to being white and learning as a kid I needed to do it when I was ready.

I love both tea and coffee but I no longer rely on it and do drink sodas and water now. 

How much my life has changed since a kid has made me see how much I have grown.

I no longer have to fear my teeth, I still struggle with the shape of my teeth but not the colour any longer, and so to be confident it means changing things in your life, the simplist of things, to keep building everyday you are alive. 

Many thanks for reading, 

Carrie X