Not all about make up but looking after your body and listening to it.

When there are so many people showing their capabilities online it can make us feel insecure because I have often asked "Why do they look like that?" and "Why don't look like that?". 

Comparing is a habit, and I have to catch myself, and remember that they would have spent time with someone dong make up and with stylists, especially for TV interviews and I can look that when I make the effort. 

I like to have days where I don't wear make up and like being casual and I do wear it depend on the day and where I am going. 

Like Wednesday I am up London to celebrate my step sister's birthday and so will make myself more presentable, and I like allowing my skin to breath.  

Beauty is skin deep, and learning about your body can important as I am not able to wear make up all of the time as my skin can react when I do, and thinking of putting some on now writing this post. I like a doing a look which takes no time at all and just wakes me up a bit, and so I will film the latest make up I use and also do plan to sort out my make up and my toiletries in another reset video, and check this new Reset video of me tidying my desk to motivate, https://youtu.be/ZJiP0hDwLks

The other thing to help me is sorting out my wardrobe each Sunday and weekend ready for the week and wearing what I have and not buying anything new, because I have plenty of clothes and outfits to wear. 

There are still items I haven't worn yet and so this is ensuring that I do and going to do as part of my next reset is sort my clothes out int the chest of draws I have in the closet I use for storing some of my clothes, and I use my wardrobe in my bedroom as my weekly clothes that I want to wear for the week and I do wear the same clothes on consecutive days. They do get washed and I do change my underwear but if the clothes aren't dirty and can be worn on numerous days before washing them then I do and having this control, really helps how I feel about myself and its not all about wearing make up, but what makes you feel good. I have debts to pay and need to focus on that and making sure that I use up my skincare products and toiletries. I do like to invest in good creams and toiletries but again, controlling this as I don't need eight moisturisers, or scrubs or sponges. I would like to invest in buying some flannels, because I do like to when I wear make up, is use hot water and a flannel. I do use Micellar Nivea to help remove make up, but once this is used, as I hate waste and am conscious of landfill use it up and it is good on the skin, but can get buy with a flannel and hot water. 

It is all about moderation. I am also working on my diet, as this can have an affect when I eat bad foods, and my appetite has changed, and don't need a lot for breakfast, but just enough so it feeds my hunger and get good benefits at the same time. This morning I had a yogurt and banana. I have bought some pancakes and so would like these with some grapes or strawberries with a small amount of honey or maple syrup so it helps with my sweet tooth. 

I want to feed my body and I do eat vegetables a lot now and I have cut back on eating meet a lot. I love meat but like non meat products too. I am all for vegan and gluten free foods, but some items aren't that much better and on biscuits they go stale very quickly so it is finding what suits my body and is going to help limit waste. 

I'd love to hear from you, what changes you going to make to help build your confidence. Please leave a comment below. 

Many thanks for reading, 

Carrie X 

Typical London Gal  

 

Rebuilding your confidence

It has taken me a long time to feel fully confident within myself and I still have days where I like "Oh its you again". Not as often though and today I was feeling super anxious so I got my exercise mat and did a bit of Pilates with some Yoga and feels good to just workout but at a slower pace. 

I feeling the slump, and doing all I can to get myself out of it and I just want to hibernate, and super fatigued. Yet I have just uploaded a new video. It is of my total reset I did in my bedroom and boy did this make a difference. Check out via this link: https://youtu.be/udenyPsPZD0

Its been a battle through out my life and so to manage it, exercise and set challenges for myself that helps me feel good and seeing what I can do and make an effort and found my style and what I love to wear and acknowledge myself and see that "There is nothing wrong with me". 

As a kid other people perception of me would influence my feelings, because I believed that everyone around me was better than me. I would think "Why can't I do that?", and have "shiny hair", "How come they can make friends and no me?" and I begged to fit in, yet often felt I was different to them and I would never feel good about myself. 

Now though I have retuned my thoughts and now being 44 years old, see things different and never allow the influence of others knock my confidence and whenever I have felt unworthy focussed on what will help me and seeing that I can have shiny hair, I just need to look after it and this will help my feelings I feel inside. 

It is the little things like that, that can make a difference. It's not about having the perfect picture, but being healthy and being kind to yourself and making an effort each day. 

Many thanks for reading, 

Carrie X 

Typical London Gal 

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Believing in yourself and be okay when you get it wrong

I always have that inner critic going and feel that I am never getting it right, example what to give to my son for dinner, and what I should wear and should I wear make up or shouldn't I and it can be tiring and this morning because I was waiting for a bus and had to wait a while decided to walk but typical as soon as I did the bus I was waiting for goes passed. 

I have started to realise that if I get it wrong doesn't matter because this will teach me to get it right and listen to my gut instinct and have faith in myself. 

Confidence isn't just about wearing the clothes that suit me or make me happy, but how I am with myself and to be kinder rather being critical to myself all of the time, it can ware me down and feel that I have so much going on in my head that I need to take a break from the self doubt I carry everyday. 

How I manage though I will look what is bothering and journal, I will walk with some music playing and I will read a book and listen to podcasts of others that have felt like I have, like Mel Robbins, Vearn Cotton and Diary of a CEO. 

I change my inner doubt in a positive way in that I use it to make sure I plan and write things down and remember the things I need daily, like my purse and keys and phone. I make sure I am on time with appointments and I completely forgot that it was my son school trip, and thankfully got a phone call the day before and has made sure I make sure I write all appointments down and on my phone. 

The school trip was a good day and feel thankful that the school phoned me and next time I will make sure put in up a board and going to make myself a notice board or get a wall calendar again to help, but not allow to bother my day and I believe in fate and feel it is on my side rather than against me. 

Many thanks for reading, 

Carrie X

Typical London Gal 

Expectations of yourself and lowering them

When there is so much expectation on us we can often feel like hiding and hopefully be invisible. We don't want people to see us that we aren't robots but human beings and so we can only handle so much. We feel bogged down and like screaming "I CAN'T DO THIS", and then feel terrible for screaming out and then makes us feel even more shallow. 

I have been there when working in a Call Centre and it was when there were riots going on, and there was news that they would be coming to where we were working in Kingston and just stood and said "I can't deal with this" and so was asked if wanted to go home, and I did. Even now I am unsure as to what this was about, but I felt this fear that people going into shops taking stuff and wrecking businesses. 

As a mum can become stressful and feel that there is a lot of judgement of how you should parent and feel that we aren't getting it right. 

This I think back was myself making me feel overwhelmed and that I had made a mindset and habit of putting myself down all the time. It can be draining when you feel no self worth, but then do I want to be feeling like this for the rest of my life? No! I feel so good about me now and because I have taken myself back a bit and gone through the insecurities I have and thought, well how can I overcome this? And it is putting yourself first. As I write that I get the little voice, "Should I say that?", but I do I feel good in my skin and lowered the expectation of myself. 

Where I would before would not take photos of myself now do and I even put together a photo book of selfies and this worked and feel that "I am not that bad after all".

Many thanks for reading, 

Carrie X 

Typical London Gal 

 

Facing a mirror

There was a time where I would avoid mirrors, because it would really make myself as I have been like an enemy to myself. I'd get so upset and would look at others think how come they look so good, but I don't?

That is the first thing, not comparing. It is draining to not want to face my face and would be my own worse critic. Looking at myself from top to bottom, and thinking "Why do I look like this?", and "Wheres my confidence?".

You don't just find confidence, because it is a feeling habit that we have done since a kid and thought being an adult these feelings would go away but for doing this habit for so long, took while to shake it off. Is to do it because we have been influenced? It can be, and being told that I have put on weight, which did happen, hard. Being overweight did bother me and so I had to make changes as it was making avoid looking at myself. I began to take on exercise, this was the best I needed. I started to look at the portions I was eating and realised I was eating big with each meal, yet a year before I was losing a lot weight. This was because I was burning it off through the work I was doing. I was working at a holiday camp and so was on a my feet a lot. 

Birth control was the culprit at the time, because as soon as I stopped taking it the weight piled off. 

Is weight everything? It can play a factor on how we feel about ourselves, and it did for me. I began to find it hard to buy clothes that fitted me and stopped going out because I was so conscious of it. I felt inadequate. 

Now though 12 years or so later I never felt as good as I do now, I like the clothes I have and putting on make up has made a difference, but also feel better when I don't put it on, I think about my skin and protect it and so allow my face and body to breathe and really take care of myself. And it is that, that can make a huge difference. 

So I can now look in the mirror and no longer avoid them. 

Many thanks for reading, 

Carrie X 

Typical London Gal   

 

 

What changes can you make, that will get rid of stress and stop anxiety from taking over that can effect your confidence

Since a kid when I would be clumsy and forgetful, I would begin to panic. This would make what I did seem ten times worth that what really wasn't that bad. I once spilt nail varnish remover on a table we had when we lived in a flat on a housing estate and because nail varnish remover had acid in it, it took the wooded paint off the table. 

I did it to show I can be responsible, so I was actually showing off, because I saw someone else do it, I wanted to follow. Basically I was taking my nail varnish off to put some more on and as soon as it happened and I saw the face on my parents, I ran into the bathroom, thinking "I don't want to be told off" but as I spilt the remover of course my family saw it spill,  and yes I got a telling off. 

Now I am an adult, I can now reason with it, and to say I learned my lesson, and rarely paint my nails, and when I do, I rarely use remover. 

This effected my confidence with using nail polish remover, because I am still clumsy but feel a little distrust in myself to do so. I know I can use it without spilling it,  but I have spilt again on carpet and so I feel me and remover will always have a love hate relationship, and it is because I need to change my relationship with. I know now to use it when in the bathroom over the sink, but took me a while to be logical about it. It is a habit, and like habits they do tend to take us back and I am still clumsy but better and not being so bloody naive.

This is made me less stressed about it and about other things, like leaving my bag in a shop, and did this once in Tesco's where I live, left my rucksack with my laptop with it, but luckily it was found and given in. 

Do I still use that rucksack? Yes,

Have I done the same since? No 

So have I learned? Yes

I did feel myself want to panic? Yes, 

Was anything taken?No. 

My anxiety started, but I took control, and that has changed me in being more reliable when it carrying my possessions, and sort it out before the panic jumps in. 

If something is stressing you out constantly then changes need to be maid because it will effect your wellbeing and your confidence, because it's gonna constantly play in your mind, until you take action. 

I have an inner strength now since those incidents, because it raised my awareness. I will take my time rather than rushing, and value myself in remembering stuff and no longer living in a day dream. 

When we beat ourselves up, all it does is cause restrictions to not do that again, in case the same thing happens, but believe in yourself and make changes, so now when put nail varnish on and take off with remover I know to take my time and over the sink. Nothing drastic has to change, just be more logical about it. 

Many thanks for reading, 

Carrie X

Typical London Gal  

 

 

Body Confidence and look after your health

To build our confidence we have to help ourselves to become healthy, and make you happy. Giving your self some time to look after your skin and haircare. I like to treat myself to nice shower gels and perfumes but don't over do it, just the amount that makes me feel good about myself. 

Take supplements. I take Garlic, Vitamin D, Iron and multivitamin, because I kept feeling fatigue and I also take legal prescribed medication, for my mental health, but taking supplements can still help and make a different to what you need. 

Look after your skin. I love Skincare as I have suffered with heat rashes, heat lumps and dry peeling skin and can make me really self conscious, so I will take my make up off in the evening, as I would often leave it on, I don't wear make up everyday, because I like to allow my skin to breath, and so I don't wear make up everyday. I do use face creams, washes, scrubs and show gels, and night creams. 

I look after my hair and don't wash it everyday, but keep my hair hydrated by using refresher sprays and serums, and blow dry my hair after every wash. It has made a difference as in the summer I can get itchy flaky sculp so I take hair of that, as I love my hair. 

Doing these things along with healthy food, can make a huge difference. 

I am still doing a Life Coaching Programme "The Summer Project 2022", and so check out my main Youtube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCUDFIqjVKLy7NhtcR6Hy0Tg and my website, https://everyonecanbuildacastle.com    

Many thanks for reading, 

Carrie X 

Typical London Gal